Like a Fine Whine

Recently, I had the pleasure of making a new aquaintance in England. I am becoming quite international you know. I am happy to introduce you to my newest friend from across the pond, Johanne from Come Whine With Me. She is quite the globe trotter and fashionista. Originally, from Norway Johanne is currently studying Journalism and Business in London. She enjoys writing and provides a unique and positive perspective on a variety of topics. She doesn't dress too shabby either.

Having the opportunity to correspond with a genuine Norweigian presented me with a unique opportunity to increase my already expansive knowledge of Norweigian culture. Hopefully, we can all gain a unique cultural perspective from this hard hitting interview.

How did you deal with the fact you were the only brunette Norwegian in your country?

This has obviously been very, very difficult for me. I was born with black hair which is why my dad was on his way out of the delivery room, unwilling to raise a Greek man’s daughter. Luckily it turned out fine, my family and friends have accepted me as the alien I am. The fact that there were no skis attached to my feet was of much bigger concern.

Do you know Brigitte Nielsen?

No, I don’t as she is from Denmark which is far, far down the street. When I was little I wasn’t allowed to walk that far so I never got to know her. My parents told me to play with the polar bears instead.

Can you knit your own sweaters? If so do they have snowflakes and reindeer on them?

I’m sorry, but no. Nevertheless, I have become very good at crocheting which is an ancient Viking tradition. I tend to forget about the patterns as Rudolf is not that interested in modeling. I’ll try snowflakes though!

What is a fjord and how can I get one?

A fjord is just a nice looking swamp. We don’t have much else to brag about so we decided to make huge bathtubs with water to get more people to visit. It comes in quite handy when you’re looking at something else we have in Norway: Nature. It’s this pretty rare, green thing with mud on.

How many cruises have you been on?

Zero, except occasional fishing trips were we pick up fish from the water to eat. And of course the very famous “Danish Boat” where red hotdogs, tacky shopping and awesome hairdos are compulsory.

Have you ever considered a career as a Viking?

I was one before I retired. They stopped using us for battles after the World War II.

What is the speed limit in Norway?

For what? Walking? Usually three steps a second, if you walk faster than that it can actually have an impact on the nature. There is this new invention there called the automobile which is limited to 100km/h on the fastest roads.

Do you have a brother named Sven?

Hmm, not that I’m aware of. My brother’s name is though very Norwegian: Gullbrand. Try to say that correctly.

Is your father named Sven?

No, Stig. Close!

Your uncle?

Nope.

How tall are you?

163 cm

I hope you all learned something. I know I did. If you would like to learn more about Norweigian Culture and read my perceptive interview on America please swing by Johann's Blog Come Whine With Me. And remember if we have learned anything from Johann we should not sell the fur before the bear is shot!